Last week, I shared a stat that sparked some conversation: only 28% of tech jobs are held by women. That post was about representation, how women remain underrepresented in the industry and why that matters.
only 28% of tech jobs are held by women
But some responses raised a valid point: men face challenges too. And they’re right. While men hold the majority of tech roles, around 75%, their disadvantages aren’t usually about getting in the door. Instead, they’re about what happens once they’re inside. These challenges stem from workplace culture, stereotypes, and subtle biases that don’t appear in hiring statistics but can affect careers just as much.
their disadvantages aren’t usually about getting in the door. Instead, they’re about what happens once they’re inside
For many men, there’s an unspoken expectation that they should always know exactly what they’re doing. Asking questions, admitting they need help, or saying “I’m not sure” can feel like weakness. In fast-moving tech environments, where knowledge is currency, this pressure can be intense. Over time, this “must know everything” mindset can limit personal growth, strain teamwork, and contribute to burnout. It can also make collaboration harder, as people may hold back questions or avoid asking for feedback for fear of looking incompetent.
Diversity hiring programs are critical for balancing representation, but they’re not always understood in the way they’re intended. Sometimes the term “diversity hire” gets thrown around as if it means “less capable,” which couldn’t be further from the truth. In reality, many candidates from underrepresented groups have had to be more qualified and experienced than their peers just to land an interview. Yet some men, especially those at the start of their careers, view diversity initiatives as reducing their own opportunities. While the intent is inclusion, the perception can sometimes be exclusion. This doesn’t mean the programs are wrong; it means there’s an opportunity to communicate them better. My advice to anyone feeling threatened is to focus on doing what you do and do it the best you can. HR’s role is to ensure that everyone meets the required standard. If you’re good at your work, you’ll shine, regardless of what hiring programs are in place.
focus on doing what you do and do it the best you can. HR’s role is to ensure that everyone meets the required standard
Every person has strengths and weaknesses, and men are no exception. But in tech, men are often assumed to be naturally great at coding or problem-solving. On the surface, it might feel like a compliment, but it’s also a trap. If a man struggles with a technical task, the weight of that stereotype can make it harder to admit it. Pride, mixed with the pressure to always have the answers, can stop someone from asking for help. This not only impacts their own performance but can also harm the team and delay projects. No one should feel forced into a role that doesn’t align with their strengths. Men should feel comfortable telling hiring managers, “That’s not my area,” without fear of being judged.
Men should feel comfortable telling hiring managers, “That’s not my area,” without fear of being judged
Not every man in tech dreams of being an engineer or a hardcore developer. Yet when hiring managers consider men for tech roles, they often default to offering technical positions first. This assumption can push men toward paths they’re not passionate about, or worse, not suited for, while overlooking roles where they might excel. Positions in design, HR, user research, or community management may have more women, and men in these areas can sometimes feel like outsiders. That subtle bias can discourage them from even applying. The solution is for men to be clear about their interests and strengths during the hiring process, and for employers to challenge their own assumptions about what “a tech role” looks like for a male candidate.
Flexible schedules and paternity leave are more widely available than ever, but the stigma hasn’t fully disappeared. Many men still feel judged, or worry it will hurt their careers, if they take time off for family. This is a pressure women have faced for decades, and now men who take their legal right to paternity leave are encountering the same unspoken pushback. My take is simple: take the leave. It’s your right, and the value of a father being present for their child is immeasurable. No one should be intimidated into sacrificing family time for the sake of appearances. And if someone tries to undermine you for taking it, that says more about them than it does about you.
“take the leave. It’s your right, and the value of a father being present for their child is immeasurable”
Tech is a demanding, high-pressure environment. Long hours, constant deadlines, and the rapid pace of change can take a toll on anyone’s mental health. But men, in particular, are less likely to speak up about burnout, anxiety, or depression. The “tough it out” mentality still runs deep, and it’s damaging. It isolates people at the exact moment they need connection and support. Normalizing mental health conversations in the workplace benefits everyone. Men should speak up when things are getting too much. Men should listen to each other. And everyone, regardless of gender, should take the time to pause and really hear what the people around them are saying. It could save a career. It could save a life.
“everyone, regardless of gender, should take the time to pause and really hear what the people around them”
Recognizing these challenges for men doesn’t take away from the urgent need to address women’s underrepresentation in tech. Both realities can exist at the same time. In fact, acknowledging the different ways people struggle is the foundation of a truly inclusive culture. When we make space for all voices, men, women, and everyone in between, we move toward workplaces where everyone feels supported, respected, and empowered to do their best work
make space for all voices, men, women, and everyone in between, we move toward workplaces where everyone feels supported, respected, and empowered to do their best work
Because at the end of the day, building an inclusive tech industry isn’t about competing struggles. It’s about shared solutions.
#inclusionInTech, #MenInTech, #WorkCulture, #MentalHealthAtWork, #TechCareers
